Christians are straight up FREAKS
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
