And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
