Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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