And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize