If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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