I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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