is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
