Pappa wants mamma naked
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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