if i can run in heels then i can drive
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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