Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas

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(210): View more from Texas

Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points

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(614): View more from Ohio

There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw

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(914): View more from New York

My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.

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(708): View more from Illinois

Less talking, more tequila

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny

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(843): View more from South Carolina

You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015

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(317): View more from Indiana

look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.

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