You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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