Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Randomize
