dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
