He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
That was before I lit my hair on fire
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
