I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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