Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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