Your tits are I can't wait for
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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