the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.