I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
