He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
