Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
