so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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