Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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