I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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