She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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