If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
How does one acquire holy water?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize