I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
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