Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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