it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Everyone says I win the strip club
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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