wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Randomize
