i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
