Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
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The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
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They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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