p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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