Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  why didn't you poke me back

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  (248): why didn't you poke me back http://tfl.nu/aomd
  Replies (5) Good night (1813) Bad night (1947)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!

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  (617): Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out! http://tfl.nu/knp1
  Replies (3) Good night (818) Bad night (872)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.

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  (401): Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars. http://tfl.nu/q4kd
  Replies (29) Good night (1606) Bad night (569)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror

  (906): View more from Michigan

  its going to be a good night

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  (231): i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror (906): its going to be a good night http://tfl.nu/k4vc
  Replies (22) Good night (5603) Bad night (909)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?

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  (850): when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children? http://tfl.nu/iefn
  Replies (26) Good night (1370) Bad night (6115)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.

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  (217): I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list. http://tfl.nu/jt04
  Replies (6) Good night (3964) Bad night (959)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.

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  (716): I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable. http://tfl.nu/tziy
  Replies (6) Good night (2580) Bad night (1099)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.

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  (414): I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before. http://tfl.nu/ok9g
  Replies (4) Good night (1131) Bad night (2108)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.

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  (780): So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM. http://tfl.nu/v5ij
  Replies (4) Good night (862) Bad night (1449)
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  (415): View more from California

  There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.

  (415): View more from California

  No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans

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  (415): There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest. (415): No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans http://tfl.nu/liuw
  Replies (13) Good night (4734) Bad night (1018)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....

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  (402): doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question..... http://tfl.nu/jtx7
  Replies (7) Good night (3390) Bad night (789)
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  (916): View more from California

  Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.

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  (916): Need. Hospital. Physically am floating. http://tfl.nu/j2sm
  Replies (6) Good night (1214) Bad night (684)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.

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  (920): Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees. http://tfl.nu/3c2q
  Replies (8) Good night (1475) Bad night (569)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.

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  (406): You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him. http://tfl.nu/veeu
  Replies (12) Good night (679) Bad night (1279)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...

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  (541): Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings... http://tfl.nu/5e5f
  Replies (1) Good night (373) Bad night (673)

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