Texts From Last Night

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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  That was long passed due.

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  (414): I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol" (262): That was long passed due. http://tfl.nu/6bqu
  Replies (36) Good night (5085) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M

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  (954): I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M http://tfl.nu/v1d0
  Replies (26) Good night (7749) Bad night (1119)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple

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  (623): Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple http://tfl.nu/1j5u
  Replies (14) Good night (4301) Bad night (1482)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.

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  (805): I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more. http://tfl.nu/p4p6
  Replies (5) Good night (3377) Bad night (1015)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.

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  (971): Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin. http://tfl.nu/6hx6
  Replies (6) Good night (2202) Bad night (1646)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Dave a horae rider a coqw boy

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  (414): Dave a horae rider a coqw boy http://tfl.nu/9zpn
  Replies (11) Good night (4091) Bad night (1015)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.

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  (773): NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU. http://tfl.nu/h1az
  Replies (10) Good night (2268) Bad night (819)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad

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  (803): My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad http://tfl.nu/1ob8
  Replies (3) Good night (1829) Bad night (511)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome

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  (931): i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome http://tfl.nu/562n
  Replies (5) Good night (1613) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment

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  (701): He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment http://tfl.nu/7mc6
  Replies (3) Good night (1769) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today

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  (231): FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today http://tfl.nu/dvgl
  Replies (5) Good night (1818) Bad night (525)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.

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  (989): I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus. http://tfl.nu/jo2t
  Replies (2) Good night (742) Bad night (247)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over

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  (515): Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over http://tfl.nu/s97w
  Replies (2) Good night (570) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka

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  (407): i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka http://tfl.nu/95pf
  Replies (4) Good night (300) Bad night (606)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.

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  (520): dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first. http://tfl.nu/2u4z
  Replies (32) Good night (345) Bad night (1231)

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