It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
