I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
