I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
