So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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