Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize