ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
whose ass print is on the piano?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
