Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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