Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
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