I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
