I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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