I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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