Whod you bang
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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