...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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