roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
It's blow job season.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
