there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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