Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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