how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
