Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm sobbing to NWA
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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