tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
