I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
it was like his penis was on wheels.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
